I have always found it fascinating how we all adopt myriads of ways to try to avoid facing the unhappiness we are feeling deep down in our lives. This is particularly so when the only real way to measure any form of success in life is by how happy we are feeling right now.

Avoidance techniques come in all shapes and sizes and can range from many forms of behaviours that we have become addicted to such as overworking, overeating, drinking alcohol, taking drugs, smoking, ideaological fanatasism, retail therapy and much much more. The essential underlying process is however the same in all of these behaviours – an attempt to stuff down our unhappiness for fear that we (or more particularly our egos) would not survive facing these feelings head on.

All that these behaviours achieve is a short term distraction from how we are feeling deep down about ourselves and our lives.

I have spent much of my life spending what money I have made on things that at the time of purchase made me feel good. Yet strangely no sooner than I had made the purchase that feeling quickly dissipated and other feelings such as guilt set in. All in all not a very successful game plan for achieving long term happiness and financial wealth. I would imagine I am not alone here. At the end of the day it doesn’t matter what behaviour you are embracing the purpose is the same – avoidance.

The “yellow brick road” to happyville is paved with good intentions however if we are ever to arrive at our destination we need to combine those intentions with positive, strong action through the creation and embracing of new more construction habits. Our habits become our lives or more pertinently we become our habits. All our avoidance tactics are well rehearsed habits that just serve to keep us on the same road to where we are right now. If where we are right now does not make us happy then we are in most definitely in the wrong place and we are most likely wondering how we got there!

Facing our deepest truths can be one of the most life altering actions we can take. Yet it does require courage and a resilient attitude. Most of us have spent our lifetimes constructing superficial lives of cardboard. These lives bare no resemblance to who we really are. Many of us will continue to live our lives surrounded by self-generated lies and will die strangers to ourselves. Do you want to be one of those people?

If not start right now and make the decision that you are now under new management. The process of discovering who you really are is an ongoing one which if you are prepared to stand in front of the mirror and look yourself in the eyes will bring joy and happiness to you. Start by looking at those behaviours that you perpetuate which do not serve you and only make you feel bad about yourself. Consider what it is that these behaviours are covering up. Be open to what comes up for you and then let it go. You should notice an immediate release and lightness. Finally choose new positive behaviours to replace those old negative ones.

There are many techniques available which can help you release buried emotions such as EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) and the Sedona Method. You can find out more about these techniques through the internet.