We are constantly being bombarded with “new stuff” from advertisers and promoters. We are told that we must have this or that new “gizzmo” or that we can’t possibly live without a particular service or product. The whole point of these adverts and promotions is to convince us that our lives will somehow be less if we do not “buy into” their way of thinking.

This is a form of subliminal brainwashing aided by visual cues portraying how we will feel or look after investing in their product or service. However, this can only work if within us there is a belief that somehow something is missing in our lives or that we need something external to us in order for us to be happy.

Given that “big business” is made from these adverts and promotions there is quite clearly a NEED to fill!

How often do we buy products or invest in services only to end up disappointed? I would hazard a guess that occurs quite frequently based on my own experience. Is it that these products or services are just sub-standard or is it that they simply cannot assuage our deep and insatiable need for something more?

The problem lies in the expectation that our lives will somehow be so much better when we have these things – yet  better than what? This predicates that there is actually something wrong with our lives right now! Unless you are one of those unfortunate enough to live in a country where simply surviving through the lack of the bare necessities or the proliferation of war is a daily struggle it is probably safe to say that you have much to be grateful for. I know that I do!

Our hopes and expectations fuelled by an undetermined need will always surpass any perceived short term relief that we get from the “new stuff” we constantly hanker for. The price of expectation is not just experienced in strict monetary terms but is also keenly felt emotionally. We end up feeling worse than before we parted with our cash!

The basic NEED that drives us to want to have more and to be more appears at first glance to be part of our genetic make-up as human beings. How often have you experienced the short lived feeling of exhilaration at having achieved a long term goal? Yet it is not long before the “opiate of success” wears off and we return to the fertile ground of NEED.

If we are not careful we can spend a significant proportion of our daily lives focussing on what is missing from our lives instead of celebrating what is present. When you actually take the time to make a list of all the “good things” in your life you may be surprised to discover that in fact you are already living the “good life”.

There is a necessary key understanding without which you will find it difficult to allay your neediness and that is that  happiness and joy can only be experienced in the present moment. All past experiences and fantasy future projections have either been and gone or have yet to happen!

The “self-help” industry has often “innocently” encouraged a forward focus through the development of personal visions and goal setting. This focus is rightly based on the understanding that we are all at cause in our lives and that we can make choices which will help attract to us the kinds of lives that we say we want. However, often we can become obssessed with our dreams and goals to our detriment. The more we focus on not having achieved our goals and dreams the more we continue to experience that “wanting”. That NEED just keeps on keeping on!

Our minds are purpose built tools which are designed to keep us safe however if left to run the show they can very quickly keep us locked into stories of lack and “scare-city”. The way to avoid spending too much time in “scare-city” is to be more in the NOW! You will find that the more you are able to be in the moment the more peace, happiness, joy and spaciousness arises naturally from within. In this moment there is no NEED. There is only a gentle resting in acceptance and flow.

This moment offers the “off button” for the otherwise turbulent waters created by our never-ending stories about what has happened or what might be. There is no NEED to satisfy and no gap to fill. There is only connection to ALL that is and ALL that ever will be.